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Topic: Plonker Award
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Plonker Award by The Sober Rigger
Date: 07/10/2010 Time: 01:24:15
That made me laugh Woz'Glad I am not alone

N.R,

That is a great idea,but I'm afraid all we have on The Piper is massive sealed windows looking out to sea,

You are right though,nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.

P.S,those windows have given us plenty of fantastic sunrises and sunsets and when a storm crosses the view is awesome.

I am still a 'Plonker Rodney'

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Martin
Date: 07/10/2010 Time: 06:49:51
So where are the pics SR (the sunrises/ set, not your culinary disasters)

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Not Required
Date: 07/10/2010 Time: 10:05:57
Yes SR I can see that having sealed windows in the galley, quashes what I thought was a jolly good excuse for the salt in the Swiss rolls. So let us think again... Since you report awesome sunrises and sunsets, you could claim, rightly so, that you were so overwhelmed by the spectacle before you that your hand reached out instinctively where the caster sugar container is usually stored only to discover later that somebody had switched it with the salt, I recommend special emphasis on the somebody else not putting the sugar back where it is always kept

One major consolation in all of this is that you might be getting some stick from the crew. Think of what it was like in the old days at sea. Lashed to the mast for punishment by lashing for salting the old mans Swiss rolls.

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Not Required
Date: 07/10/2010 Time: 15:11:31
SR what delights are you preparing tonight on the rig? Excluding salting what you shouldn't have of course Somehow I have visions of you been chased around the deck by roughnecks with high blood pressure

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Oscar.
Date: 07/10/2010 Time: 15:21:24
My Double Plonker Of The Decade award goes to.................David Cameron and Nick Clegg a.k.a. Tweedlecam and Tweedleclegg for their comedic approach to government.

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Wozie
Date: 07/10/2010 Time: 20:49:46
Today's award must go to a council who have erected a sign by a Horse Chestnut Tree saying,

'Beware if conkers fall on you they could cause damage'.

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Not Required
Date: 07/10/2010 Time: 22:15:28
Could I nominate whoever cut the hedge between the Shell Garage and Inchbrook? Looks like they did it with a baseball bat!

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by The Sober Rigger
Date: 08/10/2010 Time: 01:34:07
I'm afraid Martin there are two problems to your question.

Cameras are not allowed for us mortals as they app' can trigger an explosion(So they say)so the only cameras allowed here are basically used for recording incidents (Under strict conditions)

The second is my distinct technophobia.

We will have to get Woz' out here.

What a good idea.

N'R,I have seen worse punishment dished out for less.

Before I was married,I was tied up on deck stripped naked and the fire hose blasted at me,after being literally covered in 'Drill grease' and it wasn't the only time either.

So we have to be very careful exactly how we GAIN revenge,which I achieved some time later,with a certain unquestionable, being put in a workers boot.

Needless to say nobody owned up to it,so he went around each one of my assailants and carried out evil stunts on them

JOB DONE!

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Not Required
Date: 08/10/2010 Time: 13:47:18
Ha Ha! SR.. But based on your personal experience which I have suffered similar, but not to the same extent you describe (covered in grease and then power washed bollock naked ) think of keel hauling which was a favourite in it's time. Said this, I suppose it would be rather difficult to perform the same on a rig, added to which,could be frowned upon today as not compliant with H&S plus infringing upon the civil rights of the individual, However, a good friend of mine working off the the coast of Angola told me that for fun they would attach a poor sod, usually the new one as part of the initiation process to the hook of the crane and merrily dunked in the briny several times. The things one gets up to to pass the time in the middle of the ocean eh?

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Wozie
Date: 08/10/2010 Time: 16:12:25
Oh dear, how could they do something so horrid to such a friendly chap as you SR?

Or, did you do something awful to deserve this treatment?

Thirdly, what was the 'unquestionable' object?

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Not Required
Date: 10/10/2010 Time: 17:53:07
However it isn't illegal to park on the pavement, except in London. However it is illegal to drive on the pavement, so, unless the car was pushed there it has committed an offence.

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Manuel
Date: 11/10/2010 Time: 20:55:21
Keh?

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Gab
Date: 12/10/2010 Time: 11:31:15
For the Plonker Award I nominate the resident who wants a tree surgeon to remove all the fir cones from a mature tree because they're falling on the ground. Fortunately the Council tree officer I work with is a sensible chap and is resisting this waste of taxpayer's money.

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Not Required
Date: 12/10/2010 Time: 14:47:40
And rightly so. Why should council tax be spent on such triviality. Good on him

>> Tagged as: News - Local


Plonker Award by Anonymous Howard
Date: 22/12/2013 Time: 15:28:23
Perhaps it should go to Andy Murray as he hasn't got a personality.

>> Tagged as: Select All

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